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@rapidashpatronusBig, if true
im sorry but fuckin wHAT
End credits scene: John Mulaney and Loki walk into the Salt’n’Pepper Diner, stand for moment, and then just… grin at each other. Cut.
you’re so goddamn right
Notepad 
Random fact: In 1928 a visionary Russian poet Vladimir Mayakovsky visited Paris for the first time and wrote a poem about the slutty, slutty time he had there, ending with:
“My dick, like a mythical tale,
Has been passed from mouth to mouth.”
ABSOLUTE LEGEND
Notepad 
on my bus ride home (i’m going home for passover) there was a lil old orthodox jewish man and his DOG had a kippah and tallis!!! so i asked where he got kippot for dogs, and he was like “i ordered it online!! it’s her 13th birthday so we’re throwing her a Bark Mitzvah!!!”
:’))))
Valid
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Brain: You’re a horrible, worthless, garbage person, and your life is going nowhere but to hell.
Me: I don’t know what the fuck you expect me to do about that at 11PM, my dude.
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Limited edition character Pop Tarts (2000 - 2006)
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rory:
I just woke up why y’all yellin
the b in ihob stands for burgers instead of Breakfast
im sorry what
truth is overrated